I am glad to share with you all.......very intresting, wise and thought provoking words even though they are not mine.....These wonderful lines are penned by Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too,
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream--and not make dreams your master,
If you can think--and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings--nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much,
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And--which is more--you'll be a Man, my son!

Prayer.......
my first interaction with this word  came in childhood when my mother used to forcibly
makes both of us (me and my brother) to chant the morning and evening prayers and the graces over meals......then there were prayers in school..in temples..at all religious functions.

At that time i hardly believed in it or used to understand the reason behind
it, but slowly as i gathered my senses i started cultivating a belief that this is the bribe u offer to god for getting your things done.

Thanks to the religious outlook of my mother. I still remember how i literally threatened god to get good marks in my scholarship exam.
It had become my answer to all the problems of my golden school life. Be it exams , my soccer matches, or parents meet...... i never  forgot to plead to god.

Then on fine day......when my kitty was ill, for the first time in my life, i prayed for someone else.....and this time it was more heartfelt and sincere. Since i had learned that if you pray from heart, then it never goes unanswered.

Finally she left me, but then, she had taught me to pray for others.

Then as i started getting exposed to other people lives, i realised that my problems were much silly as compared to others ...but  then apart  from helping them , i can utilise my equity with god........by praying for them.

Yes.......praying for others......be it praying for my best friend who fled from home to marry a girl of his choice....or my other friend who had been preparing whole year for his exams......or the old lady whom i get to see eveytime on my way to  office begging for money......

So then have i stopped blackmailing god for myself.........not at all......but only after i make sure that i first pray  for all those who require more of his attention and  blessings......

She was getting engaged and all i could do was stand by and applaud along with all.
I didnt dare open my mouth for fear of saying something stupid like, "i love you".

I remember the other day when she had come to me with red eyes, her best friend was going away. It had never mattered to me that her best friend was a guy.I thought i was above such things. But her tears  awoked a sense of jealousy in my heart.Fighting it, i had consoled her and given her choclates to eat as i always did. She proceeded to rest her head in the crook of my arm and promptly felt asleep. I chuckled at her baby like innocence.

But now as i applauded i felt like someone stabbing in my heart.
She was getting married. I saw her come down the stairs decked out in her bridal
finery. Never had i seen her looking this pretty. I saw her taking the seven rounds around the sacred fire with the man i had come to hate, holding his hand.I saw her exchanging garlands with him.

She was a total stranger to me now.I was standing near the car when they both came over to me. I wondered what they wanted. I wondered how to say farewell to the departed.

Nevertheless as they touched my feet,i blessed them. She was crying, i told her not to worry and
that i would always be there.
She responded by hugging me and i could not stop the tears any more

i had just joined this company right after college and my first assignment was in mumbai......so there i was, the guy who havnt been out of his home town since years and suddenly going
to this place......the cultural and financial hub of the country also supposed to be? breeding ground for violence, poverty and? organised crime. Of course, carrying a long list of do and donts that my mother never fails to hand me whenever i go on travel.

Over there, i was zapped by the bustle and? energy oozing out of the people. Here human activities continue relentlessly through 24 hours; indeed as they say the city never sleeps. When you walk the streets among those crowded walkways, multitudes of people, vendors, hawkers, dogs, cats alike, you will feel the pulse of the city, home to so many,scrouge of so many, the fulfiller of limitless dreams.

The Locals are the life line of the city. As the train pulls into the platform you cannot help noticing the many levels of society: the working class person, the professional, the smarty-pant with no ticket, the ubiquitous vendor who tries to make a life selling anything, anywhere to anyone.

Yes, as rightly said these are just 'free' full body massage parlours which in the meanwhile move people from one end of the city to another. They also test your flying skills in sense, how fast you can board and manage to hold on by grabbing anything you can lay your hands on.

The? last Local train will be filled by people either singing Bhajans or playing cards or sharing the
days hard work? For a normal mumbaite every day is different and you see the unexpected. Not to forget the free trading tips that you would get.......while conversing with your fellow traveler.There is no limit to the enthusiasm and exuberance of the people

I still remember how i used to feel better by seeing the?vim and vigour?of the people, whenever i had a difficult day at work.
It was like, i used to absorb the energies of the people.......

Here you get to see all kinds of people. Commuters in locals, professionals, businessmen, kids with dreams of becoming movie stars ,beggars with manipulative strategies and every kind of human being one can conceive of. Here, the law of the jungle prevails: 'survival of the fittest'.

I had infact fallen in love with this city......just then i was transferred.
Now destiny has once again brought me here......and iam certainly looking forward to it.

Yes, you should spend some time in mumbai........it would teach you a lot of things about life.

Having seen so many love stories in real life, I always imagine why some people fall in love ?

Though we are aware, that most of the times we would not be able to fullfill the commitments, the promises, the dreams...............
and most of the times its ends up with wounded hearts....

But can you stop this heart from falling for someone ; one who has just swept you across your feet,? because he just like to wander like a ignorant, enthusiastic kid daring
into those troubled waters specially those for which he has been stopped or forbidden

i feel sometimes in life ....we may need to take some strong decisions, some sacrifices need to be made for the dear ones...
but at the end , are they worth? doing all this ? Beacuse unknowingly or knowingly one already commit his life ...........

Or we still want to enjoy the time for which we are together....those sweet gazes, late night walks, never ending arguments,

But at the end how can a person run from oneself ? Because from inside we are sure that we still crave for? that person.......even if its just a glance, or a forwarded mail or sms..

Then again the same question comes... Is it worth falling in love ?

But then it is greatest feeling being in love....it is the most amazing thing ever happens to anyone....
It has the power that can even inspire us to move mountains.....and gives us the? confidence to face any adversities in life.
Falling in? love and getting to spend your life with the same person, is one of the biggest success.

And finally it is a journey......not a destination

My opinion......Do fall in love........it turns you around into? a good human being.

When i look back at our life, i wonder how some incidences can be funny that it brings a smile on your face everytime you remember them.......
One such incident is my first foreign tele conference call. It was indeed a bad hair day for me when everything actually  went wrong in one sense or other.

I had just joined this US based MNC and was about to give a detailed account of the progress of an ongoing project to my customer. The director of the product line also insisted on being present as the project was very critical. Well the attendees from here were two of my colleagues and my first line Manager.

A little about my first line manager here........ ( He needs to be described...)

A 5` 10" , spectacled ( amitabh bacchan styled ), thin ludicrous buffon....resembling very much to Rowan Atkinson of Mr.Bean fame , a management freak.
His risible suggestions, and funny actions had already made him a talk of the town in my company. Lets call him Mr. X from here

My cutomer.......name........Henotter AiKenhead...(it always sounded like alienhead to me..)....This ws the first time i was going to talk to him.....
The problem was neither me nor Mr X was still  able to guess that whether the Alienhead was he or she......Nevertheless....

So the conference was scheduled for 6 o clock in the evening and depending upon the preparation i have done, it  seemed a cakewalk.
We generally have all the conference calls from our conference rooms, but Mr X, came up with idea of having it fron his cabin...  ( He always have to chip in ....value addition as we call it.. )

I dialed the no....connected to my director and then to Alienhead....and when we greeted each other.....i got the shock of my life....".Heiiiiii "   came the voice from another end.......Infact Alienhead was lady and that too a japanese or probably Korean.....i dont know......

i can fairly understand UK or US accent..........but japanese / korean english was really like arabic to me......

Suddenly in the middle of my  conversation.......Mr X phone (instrument) started whistling.......just as the microphones of roadside assemblies do.........We had atough time
adjusting to that........because it used to whistle everytime Ms. Alienhead started talking , just like road side romeos do, everytime they see a nice girl...making it more difficult for us  to understand......

Suddenly Mr X raised from his chair.....and decided ( on his own ) to cut the conversation and continue from the conference room. Probable his first decision to which we agreed upon  amicably.

So i cut the call in middle and went to the conference.........started from there..

As i was proceeding............suddenly Mr X remembered that he had forgot his walkman come recorder....the one he carries for recording the minutes of meeting.....(improvement ideas)........so we again stopped in middle........and resumed after some time interval till he brought back the tape recorder.......meanwhile i tried to lighten up the mood by talking about the weather in US,  and my directors recent visit to india..

Back came Mr X.......we were online again..
Mr X started the Walkman and instead of pressing theboth Record and play buttons he pressed only play......and yo !!!!!!!!!!   amitabh bacchan started singing from Muqader ka sikandar......."Rote hua aate hai sab, hata hua jo jayega"......( This was the height of foolery .....he always has to do something silly....)

it took full 30 seconds for us to settle down again...........reason for Mr director........technical glitch !!!!

this time around when we started i signalled everybody to switch off their mobile phones..........( code of conduct )
But as destiny has planned, it had to go wrrong......my pone started ringing, thanks to technology......i have a PDA which starts buzzing even is it switched off if have set a reminder.........
Now who should i blame..........everybody started laughing............i was  very embarrassed..........

After some time when i was just struggling to get what Ms Alienhead was saying...............suddenly one of my colleagues who was literally
sleeping on the chair........got his leg entangled in the wires below table........and in the process of freeing it.........pulled the switch board off...the connector broke...........and so was the connection....

The conference had come to an abrupt end..........tragic i wud say....i was very frustrated.........
I came back to my cubicle and wrote a mail to my director and alienhead......putting all the blame on the IT dept.

Mr X called it bad planning on my part......(He alwways does that..)....

Thank God we had already received the order for the project.......otherwise anyone can guess what  would had happened.......

That was the day.........where i felt very much frustrated....and like defeated

but then the next all my colleagues including me had a great lugh at it............and we still do........

Crying.....................

The other day i was talking to one of my friends about personal motivation and stress relaxation tecchniques.It went around the most obvious technique of Yoga.........and pranayam then laughing.

My friend sometimes (i call her psychic)always has the uncanny ability to sprung surprises on me, and this time too  she did the same..........

Crying she said.......What yes.......crying........yes the same process of releasing protein rich salty fluid from the eyes along with some alien vocalisations and heavy breathing. This according to her gives her the strength and courage to face the unknown....and relieves her off the tensions, past depressions and of course makes you feel more better.

So my mind started working back, about how many times i had actually cried recently... Infact i have cried many times......i have cried for characters in films and books.......cried while playing an emotionally charged game..burst into tears whenscrewed a important certification exam....more recently on the death of my neighbours cute little kitty......

And though i am thinking about his right now.........i actually felt better. It relieved me of the intense stress, depression and made me to accept things that are beyond our conscious control. Eureka !

Indeed crying is theraupeutic and this has been validated by Psychotherapists and counsellors from all over the world.

One need to acknowledge ones tears and  sadness and see them as a valid reaction to things that are going on in life ..
One don't necessarily feel better in that the feelings that led me to cry have gone but it allows you to move on in some sense during the day you have a cry ...  crying is probably  good  because it means that you're forced to be in the moment and confront your feelings

A very similar pattern is found in laughter, particular the infectious laughter of a group, again with tears but the starting stimulus involves humour rather than sadness or loss.

From a biological perspective three kinds of tears are distinguished ; "Basal tears" are continuous and lubricate our eyes; "reflex or infant tears" occur when we chop onions or receive a blow to the eye; "emotional tears" are psychologically caused.

There is substantial  experimental evidence of the difference between the biochemical composition of emotional tears compared to irritant tears.  The protein concentration of emotional tears was 24% greater than irritant tears.  The complex proteins in emotional tears were those involved in the human stress response.  Tears actually perform a sort of physical catharsis, expelling toxins from the body.

There are examples  galore of people using cry as a manipulative medium. There are very  few exceptions (males)  who have escaped or havnt succumbed to the Worlds greatest power aka womens tears........

Crying is indeed an emotional processing exercise. A very strong and effective one..........

Being deeply stuck and busy in our day to day chores, worries and problems, we often forget the most powerful  answer that we all have to all these.........a prayer........Here wud like to pen  some beautiful yet touching lines that i have always have in front of my eyes.........in my cubicle

The Difference

I got up early one morning,

and rushed right into the day;

i had so much much to accomplish

That i didnt have time to pray.

Problems just tumbled before me,

and heavier came each task;

"Why doesnt God help me?" i wondered,

He answered,"You didnt ask" .

I wanted to see joy and beauty,

But the day toiled on gray and bleak:

I wondered why didnt God show me,

He said,"But u didnt seek".

I tried to come into Gods presence,

I used all my keys in the lock;

God gently and lovingly chided,

"My child u didnt knock".

I woke up early this morning,

and paused before entering the day:

i had so much to accomplish,

That i had to take time to pray.

Midlife crisis..............to me? ...............noways...........

Hey wait a minute.........is it like........we here in india.......just keep growing up as all other peers do.......go to school, fight till death for the ranks....then college....engineering or medical...Bsc / Bcom..noways.......sharmas soon is applying for IIT, Sinhas girl is appearing for pre medical......always competing, fighting for marks......where are my likings......i like to play music, i like to dance,cant i make my life from  that........or the society has just been like the cookie cutter .....cutting cookies of same shape and size.......irrespective of where it come from....in collge fight for jobs.....land in good comapny......the battle continues...then promotions, then increments.........now i realised that i have myself become a mass produced commodity /product..........where do i get to live as per my wish......when can i enjoy life?.........is that i have lost my enthusiasm, creativity....and more importantly..is it that i have lost my lakshya....................... no i still have time, i have decided not to live like this.........not like a mule..but like a bird trying to go beyond horizons......

The sweetest words ever said by someone in true love : " I am jealous of the people you ever hugged because ...............for a moment , they held my world."